Big Gov - Baby, Baby, Help Me Please!

Okay, I'm so dumb that I really want the government to take care of me. I want a chastity belt to keep me from having sex and getting diseases. I want a mandatory church attendance required for Sundays. I want all fast food restaurants to offer salads and yogurt since I'm too dumb to know what I like to eat and when. I want all alcohol to actually be non-alcoholic so I can't endanger myself or my health. I want all bars, pool halls, restaurants, casinos, and pubs to be smoke free so I can't decide for myself whether I want to be there or not.

Yes, I want the government to decide for me, an adult, what I can or can't be around, do, eat, smoke, sleep with, or associate with, period.

Please, Big Government, Please Please Please help me manage my life, since I shouldn't. I only live in the freest country ever created, but I still need politicians, activists, lobbyists, and freakazoids who have never met me to tell me how, where, when, and why to live my life.

See you at the mandatory church session over salt-free, alcohol-free, meat-free, fat-free, dance-free, music-free, fun-free entertainment.

Who REALLY gets screwed in America?

Sunny, hear.

So, let me get this straight once again: While the conservatives of the world cry about Satanic socialism and the end of American capitalism as we know it (thanks to Obama being elected), they happily gather together on Capitol Hill and hand out billions of dollars to every corporate entity and lobbyist they know (and hunt with, and take pork money from, and travel in private jets with, and have Thanksgiving at front-row NFL tickets with, and sleep with, and get free plastic surgery from, and taste wine with, and... are you getting all this yet?).

So, no matter what us little guys do, it will never compete. Get it, yet???
I can give $50 to charity: it won't matter. I can get a master's degree: it won't matter. I can mortgage my house to pay for my kids' college education: it won't matter. I can clip coupons: it won't matter. I can hire an above-board CPA: it won't matter. I can NOT get pregnant before marriage, pay my bills, and try my best: it won't matter.

If you know someone, play the corporate interests, become a politician, dissolve into vitriolic hate-filled conspiracies on the air waves, intimidate, threaten and blackmail, embrace the idea of pure trash who can't or won't try, or just plain expect that THE WORLD owes you something, then you now fit right in.

Congratulations. The far right and far left now fit in with each other perfectly. Their only argument is who is going to pay for it and why, ideologically. But on paper, the government, which is ultimately the taxpayers, is paying for them both. Crazy, huh?

Both sides, how about this? I keep paying for YOU to get knocked up, and I keep paying for YOU to drill in Alaska. I keep paying for YOUR welfare because you refuse to work (even though you do so on the side), and I keep paying for YOUR new stadium that you and your team, not the fans, benefit from.

How about that? Americans paying for their own welfare, independence, decisions, and quests for success, comfort, happiness, and respect.

I'm not talking about true infrastructure, protection, supply, and transportation; I'm talking about pork and welfare and excess and lies and basic bullshit. Don't tell me a bill will help my highway infrastructure get me to work that ultimately pays for lobbyists to get wealthy. Don't tell me that Social Security will help with my retirement even though it's long gone after I've paid into it my whole life. Don't tell me it's the guy's fault or your family's or anyone else's when you had sex and then have the government pay for you and the next five kids. Don't tell me that Roe vs. Wade should be repealed when you won't support birth control or abortions even though you and other wackos refuse to adopt a child. Don't tell me that I can't get my child a decent, free education while the local, state, and federal committees get quail and champagne every meeting.

Oh, and PLEASE quit reminding me that CEO's, CFO's, auditors, dirty politicians, and related assholes of corporations that are failing or going out of business received millions of dollars in bonuses, stock options, travel expenses, and vacation homes while their stockholders, employees, and customers got royally screwed. As long as Rush Limbaugh excuses it, all of you idiots out there will actually excuse what happened and blame it on the liberals and democrats. Meanwhile, all those capitalists, investors, lobbyists, and right-wing politicians just get richer and richer. Maybe you should quit listening to Limbaugh and instead ask him for the names of his connections. Way to earn that education and think for yourselves!

Do us right, Mr. President....

To the new president,

You are the first black president our country has ever had. It's an unimaginable victory. I actually cried a little bit a few minutes ago when I read the wires.

Why? I am white. But... what? You say, "But what?" My parents and the generations before them grew up with "colored" water fountains, water hoses, colored and Jew jokes, bans on interracial dating or marriages, police stops, rape accusations, etc.

I was not the one harassed, and my generation's accusations and jokes began to pale depending on where you lived or grew up. But the separation was still there. This current generation has even less of that crap, but it still exists.

I am not necessarily happy that Obama will be our president, but not because he's not white. I have never felt he has enough experience. I have serious problems with the fact that he attended a church presided over by a racist for over 20 years and kept attending that church and defending the pastor all the while - a white candidate nowadays would have never have had that slide in the media.

Oh, and not that it might mean anything, but I also have major issues with a candidate who's wife claims that she was finally proud of her country for the "first" time about a year, year and a half ago. Excuse me? Sorry you live in a nice house, aren't starving, drive a nice car, don't have to sell your kids or have them "disappear" for military service or torture, attend any religious service you wish, and get the best education a free society can offer.

I hope you'll remember those of us who still don't have everything while you're up there, regardless of our race, ancestry, generation, or past. But please DO remember Americans before you just give away everything we've worked for.

Election Night

Senator McCain,

Historic or not, I just wanted to write you a personal note. I'm sorry you lost tonight, but please don't think I voted for you. I didn't. I respect you for being a veteran, a maverick, and a bull trapped in a goats' pen.

In a nutshell, you lost me first with that immigration bullshit. I don't deserve having non-paying illegals get a free ride after I've worked my ass off. But I still didn't consider that a "deal breaker".

There are other things that distanced me from you, but the major loss of my vote for you after Hillary got ousted was your choice of a nut job for vice president. I, a liberal libertarian, was all set to vote for you(!) until you picked Palin. Your advisors probably convinced you that since she and Hillary both had boobs that you would get the disaffected woman's vote, right? Are you kidding me? Why did you assume that we women would vote for a woman on either party's ticket after the one we liked lost? Did you really think we're that ridiculously uneducated and desperate? That's like me saying that I would just substitute one veteran for another because he's a veteran too. Or that I'd vote for one black guy because the one I liked, who was ousted, was also black.

Well, your advisors were WAY wrong!

You chose a woman who believes that abortion shouldn't be allowed even in cases of rape or incest. That's just sick whether you believe in abortion or not.

You chose an isolationist who has left this country one time in her entire life. I'd be more impressed if she had at least left once every year for the last 20 years to wear a thong for a few weeks on the beaches of Greece, Rio, Jamaica, and France and later claimed that as "international experience".

You chose a woman who has no problems prostituting her children for political clout. Wow. Youngsters and teenagers do so well being put in the spotlight during nasty election campaigns, especially when one of them is adjusting to personal, biological, and emotional changes without the help of any spotlights. (Just for clarity, I would love to see how all those political commentators would have treated that teenager and her boyfriend if she had been a Democrat's child! Funny how nice, forgiving, and even defensive the right-wing pundits were of a Republican's child. Some of those same conservative pundits got downright mean about a pre-adolescent Chelsea Clinton's looks, not even her actions!)

Anyway, Senator McCain, you definitively lost my vote when you picked that nut (Palin for those who can't read). I'm not a big Obama fan either. I don't think he has near enough experience, and he consistently fails to outline his "changes", whether they be about his plans for the war and our soldiers, U.S. healthcare, U.S. and world economics, global warming, foreign policy, etc. Honestly, I'm sorry we didn't see a great campaign between you and Hillary.

Conservatives can complain that "Bill would've run the country behind the scenes" all they want, but I don't know any spouses who are close who don't talk to each other. Do you really think no American president with a living spouse didn't talk to or listen to her during his presidency? Even those not close to their wives had brothers, uncles, friends, advisors, drinking buddies, nieces, or whatever that probably had their ear from time to time. At least Bill DID have experience for Hillary to listen to, fight about, argue with, or contemplate. Oh well.

Senator, I wish you, Obama, and your families well. More importantly, I wish our country and the world well. I hope all of you, winners and losers, remember that part. After all, We are the United States, and You are here for Us. Oh, and the World is watching.

Yes, adoptive mom, I'm talking to you...

So, something was wrong with your baby. Wow! That never happens in the real world, right? So what do you do when your baby has a problem? Walk away, according to the California couple who flew out to adopt their beautiful baby girl in Miami. Except something was wrong with her. So did they "shore up" and gather friends, relatives, specialists, and savings to take care of the child they had begged and prayed for? No.

Must be nice, I guess, to be able to just abandon a child you had promised to love and care for. As an adoptee, I can honestly say this is actually one of the most pathetic stories I've ever read. When you're desperate for a child, you sometimes take at the worst, even after expecting the best, what is given to you. This is done with all the love you have in your heart, from what I've seen and experienced about adoptive parents (not just mine). Oh, and this mentality also applies to those who don't adopt but are simply given, through birth, whatever they get after months or even years of hoping, praying, and even paying for medical technology to intervene.

You are shallow, selfish, unfathomable people who don't deserve a child. Why go through the process if you can't handle the normal ifs, ands, or buts that come with being a parent (FYI, that means not having a "perfect" child)? If you, potential mother, had actually given birth to this little girl, would you be leaving her in a dumpster because you couldn't handle the responsibility? It sure looks like it.

I would say "hope you burn", but I hate to mess up your nice suburban weekend.

Sunny

Hi, I'm running for mayor of Carrollton, Texas...

Let me tell you a little bit about myself. My name is Madison Tuttle. I graduated from Berlin Polytechnic with a Zwingender Lugner degree in Women's Studies, Aeronautics, and Phrenology, and I've been married some. While singing back-up for Cher, I met and dated Sonny, or was it Chastity? Whatever. Anyway, at one point, I was also engaged to Kurt Cobain, or was it Courtney? Well, you get the idea; I know People. Additionally, I wrote all of Ozzy's major hits, and Paul McCartney simply begged me to come write songs and sing back-up for him, too! Unfortunately, I was busy with husband number two (or was it three?) and breaking the Zodiac's code at the time and, sadly, couldn't commit. In my spare time, I invented the Internet, or was it the DeLorean? My memory is simply too fogged from Mensa exercises to remember for sure. I tried to start a family at one point, and I still believe Emily Scully is actually my love child even though I didn't get to give birth to her (don't ask me how, but aliens had to be involved). I was also Nancy Reagan's authentic psychic, Harrison Ford's visionary agent, Stephen King's true muse, and the brilliant legal adviser for Law & Order (uncredited). Busy, busy, busy! I should make a great mayor!

Oh, and this poor woman running against me claims she went by the name "Pinky". No wonder no one remembers her. But if anyone says they don't remember me, just tell them I went by "Leather".

Did I also mention being the first female Marine drill sergeant (during 'Nam, no less!)? Semper Fi!
Madison Tuttle

Crackdown on Illegal Immigrants

So, now everyone's complaining that they have no laborers. I know this affects the markets and prices, but it also has an effect on my Social Security benefits. Does no one but me get that I've worked hard my whole life, paid all of my taxes, filed every tax return, and I'll be lucky if I get my own money back upon retirement? Why am I paying for uninsured non-citizens? Why do I get stuck paying for them to have children here just so their brood will be American citizens? Why do I pay for their schooling, accidents, legal advice, lack of insurance, medical care, and incarcerations? Why am I called a racist for wanting to get what I've paid for? I pay for everything I do and buy, but my rates go up every time a non-citizen with no license or a suspended license gets into an accident or gets hurt.

My biggest question is why isn't the Mexican government doing anything, and why are we letting them get away with it? And why are we the big, racist, terrible superpower, selfish bastards who are mistreating these lawbreakers? Why are we wrong for enforcing what any self-protecting nation would consider basic? Do I think Mexicans and most other illegals are terrorists? Absolutely not. But that doesn't mean they can trample on my rights and my money and my privileges while hollering that I'm trampling on their rights! They have no rights as Americans because they're not! Wake up! They are not citizens! They have the right to be returned to their respective countries, not to receive the same rights I do simply because they showed up.

When you travel to almost any other country in the WORLD, they expect to see a return plane ticket or a time-stamped visa or an agenda describing when you plan on leaving. Are they racist or prejudice? No. They are also very clear about you not working on the black market or being under-the-table or being a student without permission. They don't want you ending up there causing trouble or feeding off their system or ignoring their laws. This is standard. So why is the United States racist or "mean" for expecting people to go home OR stay here and follow the rules and laws?

I am a total liberal, but I'm very tired of this rhetoric. Yes, we are a country of immigrants, but we need to grow up and quit acting like our own citizens are bass-ackwards racists who can't see the future. We see it just fine because we paid for it. We may not always agree with our government, but handouts and write-offs and jobs to illegals shouldn't be a part of it. Americans pride themselves on independence and making their own way. Helping people is also part of the American way, but not when they completely disrespect us and could care less about showing any sort of appreciation. Let's face it, they've been given so much leeway in the last 30 years that they really don't care, and it shows!

Thanks!
Sunny

And now, for a totally different airline story...

Congratulations to the pilot and crew of a Lufthansa jet for landing safely against horrible conditions! The crew suffered through gusts that actually pushed the plane sideways, causing the wing to scrape the runway, and they still managed to right the plane and come back around a second time and land without losing the plane or any passengers.

Whether you know it or not, you are heroes! Why, you ask? Just for doing your job? No. Anyone can "do" his or her job, but you did it in the face of great danger and despite exceptional natural forces working against you. Prosit! (Next bier's on me!)

Sunny

To see the best video, which includes background commentary from the Germans filming it, go here.

Gen N

Girl A: Wow, you look awesome!
Girl B: Like, too bad, 'cuz you look totally awesome!
Girl A: Well, duh, but you are completely, totally hot!
Girl B: Wow, okay, like, we both are! I am still so totally stunned we got on Girls Gone Wild! It was the ultimate! We are totally models now!

(Girl A asks flight attendant for water. Her request is denied until the flight is in the air and stable. They haven't even taken off yet.)

Girl A: Like, did you see how that Demi Moore type just dissed me when I asked for water? Just 'cuz the plane's not in the air yet? Who the fuck cares? Like I need water, like now. Duh.
Girl B: Shya, like she may have been there, done that, but she must be, like totally jealous of how young and pretty we are and she's not anymore. Like ignore her. She's totally nothing, and we're like, you know, hot! And we've shown our boobs on Girls Gone Wild! We're fuckin' models!
Girl A: Like, like you're totally right! But then, you're always right. And hot too!
Girl B: Fuckin' A right!

(The girls engage in mindless chatter about Paris Hilton [like, she's totally hot!], the breast implants Daddy A promised for Girl A's upcoming 21st birthday, scoping totally hot frat guys for the M.R.S. Degree Mom said to get, etc.)

Girl A: I can't believe that stupid bitch brought me some generic bottled water, not even Voss or iLove! What is it Daddy says? Stupid pheasants!
Girl B: Peasants, pheasants, presents.... Whatever. Those people are like totally fucking stupid! And they're not hot!

(Exit Girl A to lavatory.)

Girl A: Like, some stupid old hag is in the fucking bathroom! Like, what's her problem?
Girl B (joining Girl A): Like, she's old and ugly and not young and pretty like us. She must be hogging the bathroom because she's, like, totally jealous of us!
Girl A (banging on lavatory): Like, come out right now stupid fucking old hag! You're just jealous!
Girl B (banging on lavatory): U.G.L.Y. You ain't got no alibi! You ugly, heh heh, you ugly! (giggles shrilly)
Girl A: Girl, you are like, so funny! That stupid ugly bitch better come out of the fuckin' bathroom, now!

(Man exits the restroom.)

Girl B: Shit! It was a fucking guy! Asshole!
Girl A: Too fucking bad anyway. He's just totally jealous because we're hot and he's too old for us. And U.G.L.Y. And he has man tits. And he's probably poor too. Asshole!

(Flight attendants intervene.)

Attendant: Girls, you have been warned several times. Please return to your seats, stop using profanity, and act your age.

(Both girls speaking to attendant.)

Girl A: Like, oh my God! You are like, so fucking jealous! (turning to Girl B) Like, did you hear how she just totally admitted being jealous of our age? (back to attendant) Like, it's not our fault we're pretty! That's the only reason you're fucking picking on us, you fucking bitch!
Girl B: Shya! You can tell just by looking at us we're models!
Girl A: Like, and you just need to get over it, or I'm like, calling my Daddy and I'll end up owning this fucking plane, you fucking pheasant!
Girl B: Like, she will, totally. I saw the whole thing, and they'll believe me because I'm totally pretty, and you're not. We're being totally discriminunated against for our looks! Duh.

(Later, after landing in L.A. and being met and interviewed by L.A.'s finest...)

Girl A: We are like, so totally gonna sue! It's discriminumination!
Girl B: Shya, like, did you see how that cop even ignored my boobs? They're just jealous too 'cuz they only have ugly hags on this coast. Duh.
Girl A: Totally. Besides, your boobs do look hot.

(Mr. and Mrs. A come to the rescue, again...)

Daddy A: Sweetheart, we're so proud of you for standing up for yourself! Those brutes didn't hurt my princess, did they?
Girl A: Well, I did get a bruise when that evil stewardess pushed me back in my seat! See? (showing week-old ankle bruise) And that horrible rent-a-cop ignored my boobs and even threatened to cuff me! Like, can you believe it? Me? The next Paris Hilton!
Mommy A (to husband): Dear God, honey, call that damn lawyer of yours right now. That worthless bastard better drop every other client he has and take care of this ASAP after all the money you've pushed his way. You paid him a fortune that time those terrible gossips went after our little princess....
Girl B: Mr. and Mrs. A, where are my parents? Not like I care, but....
Mommy A: We couldn't reach them on their yacht, hon. But we're taking you and Princess home with us and getting this mess cleared up. Those sorry sons o' bitches don't know who they're dealing with by fucking with our two beautiful girls! (Both girls start sobbing.) Poor sweet darlings. It's sad that people turn ugly just because they're jealous. (turning to husband) Honey, we need to get them to a spa immediately! This stress can't be good for their complexions! (back to girls) Poor sweethearts, you're too beautiful and rich to be at fault for any of this awful mess. Let us take care of this like good parents should.
Girl A (to parents): Actually, like, this is all your fault! If you'd have let me get my boob job when I was 17, none of this would have ever happened!
Mommy A (to husband): See! I told you that boob job was more important than some stupid education! College is just for finding a rich husband, imbecile! (back to girls) That's okay, girls. It's Daddy's fault, and he'll fix it. We're going to the spa, and then shopping on Rodeo Drive, and then a relaxing dinner at Dolce. You've had such a trying day, no curfew tonight. After dinner, you two go out and club hop and have some fun! Daddy will get you a limo and unlimited spending money, k Punkin'?

The End

story
video of those poor pretty girls

Little gifts are the best treasures, Part Deux...

My favorite key chain, the little blue alien, broke a few months after I got it. Unfortunately, the break is with the little plastic man himself and is not fixable. I whined about my little alien being "gone" to my friend and her boyfriend, and she actually offered to give me hers (she had bought one for herself). When I explained that I was just joking, they brought me back a different key chain from San Francisco. It's a neat oval view of the skyline with birds flying and the bridge in the foreground. Again, I love gifts like this. They don't cost a lot and show that people are thinking of you!

Now, here's the best: This same couple had a short-term job in the Bahamas not long ago. Just to give you an idea, they're a couple in their twenties who are both attractive but haven't gotten married or had kids yet. They're a good couple together. B can be very funny to watch because he's uncomfortable talking about subjects like woman problems, girl stuff, attractive men, etc.

Before they left, M asked what I wanted. I told her I wanted a young, buff hottie with an accent and NOT with a speedo. You get the gist of it: I was asking her for pictures, but we all talked as if she was going to smuggle a man back in their luggage. When I repeated the request to B, he was very uncomfortable and said that that was his girlfriend's department. Boy, does he get cute (and red) when he's shy! Long story short, they brought me back some pics from the beach, and man, Americans (no matter what age), have just plain gotten fat! I'm not saying they should all look like Mark Wahlberg or Arnold Schwarzenegger, but wow! M said there just weren't any decent specimens to look at, but she did say B would've gotten some great pics of an old fat guy in a speedo if he'd had their camera at that moment (he may be shy but has a great sense of humor!). Anyway, I also got a great key chain and a small shell, not to mention tons of laughs with my friends. I truly appreciate these seemingly small efforts that aren't small at all because these people always take time out to think of me. Friendships are truly a treasure.

If anyone besides me ever actually reads this blog, I encourage you to send me a key chain from wherever you are or wherever you go. I'll also accept young, buff hotties with accents.

Sunny

An Open Letter to John McCain

Senator McCain,

I am a liberal who has always liked you, and, before the immigration issue, would have voted for you in a heartbeat even though I usually vote Democrat. I like it that you stand up for your beliefs and don't back down from your own party. I truly appreciate your service and sacrifices for our country.

Unfortunately, your stance on immigration is a "deal breaker" for me. I can't understand why you think it's okay to give people who haven't given their time, energy, and the money it takes to become true citizens some sort of free ride? Those who truly want to be citizens and live as Americans take classes, attempt to learn the language, pay taxes, earn honest wages, exhibit patriotism for their new country, and are exemplary citizens. They are proud of their efforts, culminating in an Oath of Citizenship. Why should others just be handed something that other people don't take for granted?

In fact, why should those with no interest in citizenship or assimilation be given free access to the programs I have paid for? I don't get food stamps or go to the emergency room for "free" non-emergency medical care or get government hand outs, and I expect the same from others who are capable of earning a living. I don't even have kids, but my local property taxes pay for the schooling of children in my area. Why should I be paying for children whose parents don't contribute to the system? Why should my Social Security benefits go to those who haven't paid into that same system all these years? Why should my health and car insurance go up every year to cover those who are getting free medical at emergency rooms, getting free prescriptions, not paying for medical treatments, and those who are getting into driving even though they have no driver's license or insurance? Why should our taxes go up every year to house the thousands of illegal immigrants in our jails and prisons rather than sending them home?

Frankly, before President Bush offered to give these people a free ride, I hadn't thought much about it. I won't lie and say I haven't employed illegals because I have on three different occasions (for day jobs, not long-term employment). But that was before someone told me they were just all of a sudden going to be citizens and get the same benefits I have paid for over the years. Sorry, but I'm not going for it even if that makes me sound like a hypocrite.

Don't expect something for free while others have worked hard their whole lives and paid into the system, or who have spent the time and effort to learn and to become United States citizens, or who have fought and died to ensure our rights and freedoms.

I'm proud to be an American, and yes, I got it the easy way. I was born in this country, and so were my relatives going back more than a hundred years. My family is conservative (I'm the anomaly), and they've always worked hard and taught me to do the same. We may not always like some of our government's actions, and we may not always agree with their rhetoric, but we respect each other's right to an opinion. My opinion, Senator McCain, is that you should do the right thing and not encourage the granting of amnesty to people who don't respect the responsibility of citizenship.

Sincerely,
Sunny

Sorry, snowboarders....

Sunny here.

Sorry to do nothing but gripe, but many snowboarders need to GROW UP! I am not a good skier, so I eventually tried snowboarding. I love snowboarding WAY better than skiing, but I know my limits. Unfortunately, many snowboarders are too young, too rude and crude, and too arrogant to know their limits. They blame "snobby", inexperienced, slow, and "snotty" skiers for complaints about their behavior on the mountain. They are more likely to try dangerous stunts that go wrong or result in injury, are too arrogant to admit that they don't know how to control their boards at every turn or jump, and show little or no respect for those around or in front of them because they want to show off and develop their skills, especially if they are risk takers experimenting with new moves. In general, they show a far greater lack of respect for others on the mountain than their skiing buddies. (My apologies to those boarders who respect the rules of the trails, know their limits, and test their boundaries away from the public. I also want to acknowledge the many skiers out there who don't know their limits, put others and themselves in danger, and don't have clue.)

Hey, everyone is up there to have fun. You don't own the mountain, and neither do they (look at that sentence however you want, boarders or skiers). But you have to have respect for those ahead of, in range of, and behind you. Don't run over other people; don't tear up "bumps" or try blacks without guidance or experience; don't try something new and/or risky without others close by to keep on eye on you and give advice or blaze an example; don't go off trail without permission (think of it like a flight or Scuba plan: let someone know where you are, what time you're due back, and what gear and experience you have); do give the people below you a warning about which side you're heading or turning to; do watch for children, beginners, slow movers, and the tired, elderly, injured, and those with altitude sickness; do slow down and evaluate if you notice a problem or something unusual ahead, aren't sure of the terrain, or don't think your skills can match what's coming (trees, bumps, etc.); do stop for those who have "flagged" themselves as injured or who have lost equipment/clothing/gear and need assistance; do watch for single-person ski or board tracks that disappear into tree lines or other off-limits areas (out-of-control or risk-taking skiers and boarders may need assistance if lost or injured); do carry water and drink it every chance you get!; do keep your head, hands, and feet warm and dry (if possible); do carry a trail map; and do find a way (via ski patrol, cell phone, other skiers or boarders, lift ops, whatever) to call for help for someone in need. ALWAYS stop for someone who needs assistance, even if it means you have to stop and boot back uphill. ALWAYS stop for suspicious tracks that appear to go outer limits of designated slopes, especially if there are not multiple skiing or boarding tracks in the same area. This person may be injured or lost and need help from ski patrol!

Back to why I started this: My cousin-in-law was run over during the holidays by a snowboarder at Angel Fire Ski Resort. She ended up with one broken rib and one fractured rib. She was just skiing along, so please don't write me any crap about how it was her fault, k? The guy didn't even stop, and they couldn't find him to pull his pass. My young niece (9 years old) was almost run over by a different snowboarder while she was a beginning skier at the same resort on the same weekend. (And some of you wonder why Taos still bans snowboarding. Talk to your comrades who have no respect!) This isn't about elitism or matching outfits and expensive skis or about freedom or expressing yourself with your tattoos, alternative music, and piercings; it's about safety and courtesy and fun. Hey, we're all on the mountain together, no matter which side you think you're on.

Which brings me to my next point: I found a page where this idiot not only doesn't identify himself or know how to link a site (to his own homepage, no less) but exudes in no uncertain terms exactly the kind of imperious attitude he's talking about regarding skiers. He's a snowboarder (I'm an Idiot Snowboarder.com). He thinks boarders are so special that they should be proud of a shitty, uppity attitude, the one where they run the mountain and then run over effete, pristine skiers and their uppity kids. What the fuck? (By the way, Dude, it's "effete", not "efeete" That's not being elitist on my part; it's being educated. Your whole take on skiers' attitudes rings hollow when reading your uppity opinions about the attitude boarders should have.) It's his take on boarders' attitudes that keeps people on the mountains (skiers, responsible snowboarders, resort owners, insurance companies, etc.) unhappy. He obviously thinks boarders own the mountain and fuck the rest of the people if they don't like boarders' rude and dangerous antics. What was he saying about elitist skiers? Hello????? (Check out the prices of skis and boards and all the attached gear and tell me again why boarders are so much more poor and therefore better philosophically. NOT! Oh, and if Idiot Snowboarder argues about his gear, I'll be happy to tell him about how many times I skied and boarded without a bib or anything but Scotch-guarded jeans and gators. Same difference, Dude. Snowboarders spend just as much for their Burtons and Volcoms as skiers spend on their shit.) Your contemptuous attitude sucks (you just think it's cool because it's somewhat non-traditional - reread your own message to see just how pretentious it really is).

I'll be happy to post something just as smug and rude and extremist from a skier if someone sends me one. Meanwhile, it's this type of asshole disregard for others that makes the mountain a war zone for everyone, instead of fun maze of bumps and bunny slopes and poling ramps and slalom courses: I'm an Idiot Snowboarder.com.

Blaze those trails and have fun but respect your skills, Mother Nature, and those others sharing the slopes with you!
Sunny